The Magic of Today
“I live a day at a time. Each day I look for a kernel of excitement. In the morning I say: “What is my exciting thing for today?” Then, I do the day. Don’t ask me about tomorrow. Barbara Jordan
Sometimes I think how strange it is that though we have so many “time-saving” inventions, we never seem to have enough time in each day. My to-do- lists are never completed. I think maybe we should make our lists each evening, then eliminate all but three tasks. And spend the time we “saved” doing what will make great memories.
A couple of decades ago, a popular women’s magazine featured an essay by a 95 year old woman. In it, she listed what she’d change in her life if she had it to do all over again. She said, “I would run barefoot more, dance more, sing more, play more . . . and love more.”
I would add be silly more often, kiss more, hug more, open all the fire hydrants on hot days, sneak off to fun movies more, be a kid more often.
A grand memory: In Washington, D.C. there was this wonderful seedy movie theater owned by two elderly brothers who loved classic films. They loved being kings of their little movie fiefdom. So they created the first Dollar movies ever heard of at that time.
Ten tickets for ten dollars and use them anytime you wished. I discovered the Circle Theater in the heart of the K Street culture when my son and I were invited to join a single dad and his three sons to a cheap date. He sprung for the tickets; I bought the candy. I was hooked. Anytime I wanted to “run away” from real life, I would run to the Circle Theater. It was fun sitting in an afternoon film, surrounded by folks with brief cases at their feet and candy in their fists – all hooky players like me.
It’s so hard to play being a kid these days. Even kids are having trouble being kids. That said, it’s not impossible. Each morning, I take a minute to stretch my arms and legs before I get out of bed. Why not stretch my mind and imagination, too? Tomorrow, I’ll try it. What’s going to be exciting today, World?” I’ll ask. And the world will say — what?
Meditation for the Day
Ancient Egyptians believed that they would be asked two questions when they die; their
answers would decide the direction of their afterlife journey. The first question was, “Did you bring joy?” The second was, “Did you find joy?” Leo Buscaglia
Action for the Day
Today, I’ll ask myself, “What’s my exciting thing for today? And I’ll take time to answer.
Jiggle Wiggle Flexible Jell-O™
I believe that you control your destiny, that you can be what you want to be.
You can also stop and say, ‘No, I won’t do it, I won’t behave this way anymore. Leo Buscaglia US author, educator
In Washington, D.C., there’s an AA meeting I really enjoy. The crowd is always raucous – they cheer and stomp their feet and visit back and forth as speakers tell their stories. Although I usually go there when one of “my boys” is celebrating, it’s the first timer who brings tears to my eyes.
My favorite is a young man in his twenties who seemed to have a hard time standing up. He was pale and stressed out and a little sweaty. He said, mumbling: “Yesterday I was drunk. But I started thinking about how things would be if I got sober. So this morning, I tossed out a vodka bottle and the three beers I had left. I’ve been sober now for about nine hours. I hope I can keep it up. I tried a couple of times before and it didn’t take. But this time I made myself come here.”
The leader hugged him and pressed a one day chip into his hand. The shouting and cheering became too loud for me to hear what folks were saying to him but I could see the way he was being hugged and encouraged. What made him decide to get to the AA meeting – finally? Well, it’s like this. If you’ve ever seen the commercial where the people jiggle like Jell-O™ and twist themselves into shapes of letters, you see it in action. He was flexible. He had the choice of being a drunk or being someone with a real life. He voted with his feet: he came to the meeting.
A gazillion years ago, in Roman times, a slave named Epectitus decided that we order our lives by our attitudes about what’s happening to us. He said that concentrating on being flexible mentally helps us CHOOSE how we look at whatever is happening to us.
Are you flexible in how you think or act about what’s happening in your world? Can you find the flexibility in you to choose the reaction that is in your best interest?
Meditation for the Day
“The creative thinker is flexible and adaptable and prepared to rearrange his thinking.” A. J. Cropley
Action for the Day
From now on, I’ll ask myself: Am I flexible in how I react to people, places, situations, new ideas? How would my life change if I decided to work on my flexibility?
Come Out and Play?
“What is work and what is play confuses the wisest of men.” Paraphrased, Hindu Holy Book
When I was five, hopscotch was my favorite game. At 10, I liked jacks, sliding down rain-drenched neighborhood hills on huge pieces of cardboard, and hunting for wild violets. At 16, I was expected to work for money. So I did. I was a telephone operator; it was a terrible job for me. I hated it. It was grinding work with a capital GW.
One day, I became saturated with unhappiness. I went home, cried a lot, dug out my rainy day savings, and learned how to be a secretary. NO, I didn’t like that, either. But while I learned how to write bad shorthand, I did do one good thing – I earned my GED. Using that GED, I went to college. I became a writer. Now that’s been a life time of FUN!
Once upon a time, a boy born with a disfiguring hare lip had a rough time growing up; he was rejected, humiliated, bullied by cruel classmates. By age 14, he had no successes to claim his own. His only ambition at age 14 was to have a job. He applied alone; he went with friends. They were hired; he was not. After a humiliating go round with a fast food chain, he knew. “They don’t want their customers to see me,” he told his mother.
Soon after, one of those managers lost almost all his teenage employees at once; he decided to hire the boy. They kept him in the back unloading frozen chickens and cleaning. Never mind, the boy was delighted. He did his work and filled in for anyone who didn’t show up. He did his very best at the most menial chores, cheerfully. Soon, he was transferred to the front. “Mom, mom” he cried out that night, “I’m flipping burgers and my class mates saw me!” When he left for a better job, the managers bought him a dressy sweater as a thank you for his exceptionally good work habits!
Today, this same boy is a physical therapist. He says he knows how his patients feel because he suffered. David is now a very happy man – and thanks to a fine surgeon, a very handsome man.
Meditation for the Day
“Anything you’re good at contributes to happiness.” Bertrand Russell, British writer
Action for the Day
Today I’ll look at my work and find in it what pleases me most. Or consider changing my work or how I approach it so it is pleasing to me.
Three Cheers for Audacity!
“Success is the child of audacity.” Unknown
In 2008, a relatively young man of 46 upset the entire political scene in America. Barack Obama, who created the first Internet grass roots political campaign in our time, had the audacity to compete for presidency of our nation.
As the Democratic Presidential Nominee Barack Obama said repeatedly that it is only because of the American Dream that a bi-racial man from a working class can family run for President. Most of our country was stunned when he won the Demoncratic Nomination against one of the most powerful political families in our country. His story will always be one of David vs. Goliath and like the Bible story tells us, David won.
What is most important is what his nomination means to all kids, to all adults who tell themselves their dreams are impossible. His nomination says anything is possible.
Within weeks his was nomination teachers were reporting that students were suddenly taking their studies more seriously. I CAN DO SOMETHING WITH MY LIFE, they know now. One father said of his daughter, “Now I look at her future differently. I won’t let her “settle” now.”
So what does this mean to you? No one expects you to run for the presidency. But this man’s story says that the only barriers we face are those we accept. So, did you drink today? Smoke until your throat hurts? You took drugs this morning? Listen carefully. That is not NOW. Whatever you do that is self destructive you can turn around. This man decided to earn scholarships to the best colleges so he earned the grades to do that. He wanted to squeeze the best he could from his experiences – and he did. He knew this: YOU CAN MOVE ON; YOU CAN CHANGE; YOU CAN GROW if you decide that’s the only thing you want more than anything else in your world. That’s the lesson Barack Obama’s election offers everyone.
Meditation for the day
“Yes You Can.” American President Barack Obama
Action for the Day
What do I want to be doing 30 days from now? I will write that on my mirror and let nothing sidetrack me. Nothing. Not even me.
The Fourth of July!!!
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“You can protect your liberties in this world only by protecting the other man’s freedom. You can be free only if I am free.” Clarence Darrow, American lawyer, speaker, writer |
Excerpt from the Declaration of Independence:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”
After the 9/11 attack on America, victims’ and heroes names echoed on television; were pinned on photos of the victims near what became Ground Zero. Photos show a kaleidoscope of nationalities, ethnicities, religions, and genders. Every group imaginable is represented in the victims’ – and the heroes — rosters.
So, as we head towards the presidential campaign, I yearn for a leader who knows that when we accept each others’ differences and celebrate our similarities, we truly honor those who die or are maimed in the service of our country. Wherever and whenever.
This is the toughest task we can ask of each other. There are so many differences among us. Different cultures require different responses; we have diverse speech, diverse backgrounds, even different uses of personal space. But nothing is insurmountable. ANYTHING can be solved if good will is there.
Today, the fireworks are for all of us. The high school baton twirlers and marching bands are for all of us. The incredibly diverse July 4th concerts at the Washington Monument and Capitol steps are for all of us. This is OUR day. Happy Fourth of July, everyone!
Meditation for the Day
Difference is not the same as lesser.
Action for the Day
Today, I’ll think of one person I’ve always considered very different from me and think of three things we have in common and celebrate those three things with them.
Hot Sand and Fireworks
“Life is like an ice-cream cone, you have to lick it one day at a time.”Charles M. Schulz, cartoonist, Peanuts
“Each day I think I’ve got it all licked. Then just as I relax and let it all hang out, I get zapped with something – small or not so small. Am I jinxed or something?” A musician friend of mine said this just after he “jinxed” himself. He insisted, on his second day working for a well known performer, that he be paid twice for the same down payment he had already received. Why? Because he, my friend, had lost his first down payment. The famous singer said, “NO, and forget it, Tom. I can’t work with someone who tries to hustle me.”
Knowing Tom as I do, he wasn’t trying to take advantage of the man but he was not working in his own best interest. The mistake Tom made, and which lost him a great opportunity, was to believe that someone else should be responsible for his lack of responsibility. In fact, Tom is the most self-destructive talent I’ve ever known.
He’s not alone. We all do it – it’s called “shooting yourself in the foot.” I’ve done it; you’ve done it; our Aunt Susie has done it. Unfortunately, it’s human nature to blame the other guy. We skip over our errors; we don’t want to see what we contributed to our failures or near failures so we refuse to see them. Some blame a lack of education when they made the decision to run off to play instead. Some blame the supervisor who “doesn’t like me” but forget to mention that they miss too many days of work, arrive late every day, and may slough off as much work as they can onto others. And whine.
Some, on the other hand, grit their teeth and learn from the rough spots. They get it that life has some rain but lots of sunshine each day and grab the goodies they “find”. When we leave denial behind us, we are more able to see opportunities.
Here’s an amusing and enlightening example. A gal pal was moaning about not having a man in her life. Another gal suggested she count every man she interacts with each day as one of “her men.” Lo and behold, after two weeks, she had an impressive list of men she had met, talked to, shared coffee with, etc. More than she had met in months! She opened her mind to new acquaintances that happen to be male. And there was lots of ice cream out there.
Meditation for the Day
Change can come about, one day at a time, if you really want change.
Action for the Day
Today, I’ll look for opportunities for change and for happiness and take advantage of them as I find them.
Laugh and the World Laughs With You
“Laughter is the closest distance between two people.” Victor Borge, American Comedian and Pianist
Ask most women what is sexy and you may find yourself surprised. When polled, most women say the best husband is one who has a good sense of humor. Did you ever notice that even just hearing other people laugh makes us feel good? I have a theory. I think that happiness is so closely associated with laughter that we feel happy whenever we laugh – or even just hear happy laughter.
Children’s laughter is especially warming. A basketball hoop and small playground are near my home and youngsters’ laughter punctuates every day. Teens’ around the hoop and laughter of little ones running in games bring back memories of my own Hopscotch days and remind me that life has, as always, lots of innocence in it.
One evening, as I sit reading, I hear laughter wafting through my open window. A family who lives nearby has out of town family members visiting. They sit on a nearby porch; as the evening goes on; their chatter is occasionally interrupted by huge waves of hearty laughter. You know, the kind that comes with reviews of past family gaffes.
Their family laughter reminds me of a day when I was a small child. We were visiting an uncle who was a baker. Each day, Uncle Tony returned home with long crisp loaves of bread tucked under his arm. This day, my grandfather sat under a bird cage. My grandmother jokingly took a loaf of the bread and tapped Grandpa Ralph sharply over the head. It was dry stale bread. It broke into a hundred pieces, crumbs flying everywhere! Grandpa Ralph jumped up, hit the cage, and accidentally set the bird free! Everyone raced to catch “Tweetie” but we were all laughing so hard we had a tough time putting Tweetie back in his cage. We laughed so hard we were exhausted by the time we left Uncle Tony’s home. It was a great day.
Meditation for the Day
“Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.”
Action for the Day
From now on, I’ll look for the laughs in life; large ones and small ones. Mine and others’.
How Can I Live My Life if I Don’t Like Me?
“The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me courage to face life cheerfully have been kindness, beauty, and truth.” Albert Einstein, Physicist, theories of relativity, Nobel Prize for Physics
Three elderly ladies sit on their porches in their summer dresses, watching as the man digs out the earth. They sit quietly, each in her own thoughts. They are disturbed thoughts, not the happy thoughts they deserve to have in their advanced ages.
The sight of the man digging is disturbing because they are decent, kind women and what they were watching is the theft of another elderly woman’s garden. It is particularly disturbing because they dare not protest. The theft of rose bushes they see ripped out, the raw dirt space that is all that is left pains them. Three newly planted large shrubs designed to fill both adjoining garden spaces stand as testimony to a kind of rape. The three women feel horror, pity, and sadness for their new neighbor who will arrive to find her garden gone – torn up, replanted, usurped.
A community bully, whose wrath the women fear, is stealing the garden space; she hired the man they watch to make it hers before the legitimate owner arrives. It is a dastardly act none of them would consider doing. The three church ladies, Christians all, are appalled.
And the bully? Patricia feels powerful. However, Patricia misses the point and tragically may always miss the point. Anyone can bully and do violence to their community and to others. However, each time Patricia “wins”, she loses. For blocks around, her reputation as a bully goes before her. She imagines herself queen of the area; instead, she is despised. She wants to be adored, revered by all; instead, she is held in contempt.
No one has to be a Patricia. As you offer kindness, beauty and truth to others, you learn to love and not hate — and it is mostly self-hatred that drives the Patricia’s of the world.
Meditation for the Day
“According to the karma of past actions, one’s destiny unfolds. . .” Unknown
Action for the Day
Today, and each day, I will be kind to someone; be honorable in my dealings with others; and choose not to harm anyone in any way. For their sakes — and for mine.
Texas Women Do the Durndest Things
“Lots of Texas chicks are Hells Angels at heart.” The Yankee Chick’s Survival Guide to Texas
Texas gals are proud of their big hair, bling, and howdy do’s but under all that, they are frontier gals.
They can skin a catfish, hunt down a bear, and think straighter than an arrow can fly. They can also deep six a female rival with nine words: “My, but you’re a precious lil ole thing.”
Texas women think Perky is a religion. However, take a look at some: Congresswoman Barbara Boxer, the late Texas governor Ann Richards, Mary Kay with her pink dynasty and Ebby Halliday, Queen of Texas residential real estate are anything but fluff balls. A huge favorite of Texas women from progressives to those who would rather run nude through Neiman’s than be called Liberal, was the late Molly Ivins.
Ms. Ivins wrote a feisty down home column which ran in about 350 newspapers. She was rowdy, funny, up front and sliced and diced those she saw as too big for their political britches. When the Texas Legislature opened, she would warn her readers, “every village is about to lose its idiot.”
She loved Texas and she loved our nation and she never gave up on either of them. I figure as long as Molly’s words live on, so does she. So here’s to Molly Ivins:
• “The first rule of holes: when you’re in one, stop digging.” Molly Ivins
• “The thing about democracy, beloveds, is that it is not neat, orderly, or quiet. It requires a certain relish for confusion.”
• “One function of the income gap is that the people at the top of the heap have a hard time even seeing those at the bottom. They practically need a telescope.”
• “If his I.Q. slips any lower, we’ll have to water him twice a day.” (about a congressman)
• from her last column, January 11, 2007: We are the people who run this country. We are the deciders. And every single day, every single one of us needs to step outside and take some action to help stop this war. Raise hell. Think of something to make the ridiculous look ridiculous. Make our troops know we’re for them and trying to get them out of there.
Meditation for the Day
“Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” Voltaire
Action for the Day
A thought for today: Who do I appreciate most and why?
An Artist’s Life Rules
There is no exception to the rule that every rule has an exception. James Thurber, writer
That said, an artist’s life is full of rules and exceptions. Some may seem outrageous; others may be outrageous. But all offer guidelines to help us stretch our imagination, to help us think and see “out of the box.” Artists find their own paths which are usually not straight as a string but meandering like a country road.
People are always making rules for themselves and always finding loopholes. Artists live by their own rules from necessity. As outrageous as they may seem to some, their rules offer an invitation to imagination’s palace. Artists live simple lives; they thrive on concentrating on things outside themselves. They have their own laws.
1. Be willing to kill your babies. Artists “babies” are the fruit of their imaginations. Artists need to abandon those that are inferior without hesitation. This, in order to create more and better. You chuck the second rate in order to embrace the better idea, better art work, better career goal, more rewarding personal life style. Besides, anyone creative has ideas to spare.
2. Creating a series of anything perfects skills and instincts. Each move forward, repeating the goal with different paths to it, grows our mind’s vision of the better concept. Isn’t that the same way with our lives? Doesn’t today’s idea grow on the back of yesterday’s?
3. Have fun working … it’s all a process, not a demand for perfection. Creating art – or art-like environments, relationships, shaped lives – is not a destination; it’s a journey that strings out until suddenly, there it is, our inner image all of a piece.
4. Listen to your own voice . . . and others. Trust your own instinct but don’t close your mind; research, research, research. Listen to suggestions even when you feel they won’t be anything interesting to you. Feedback before completion is the path to perfecting the product – and a way to avoid wasting time or money. After you’ve considered improvements or suggestions, put your feet down and move.
Meditation for the Day
Life is an adventure: trust your final instincts and have fun.
Action for the Day
Today, I’ll consider listening to my own voice, chucking the mediocre, and having the patience to perfect my concepts, and/or product before I consider it a done deed.
