Movin’ On
September 3, 2008 · Filed Under
Insights
“When the door of happiness closes, another opens. But often times we look so long at the closed door that we don’t see the one which has been opened for us.” UnknownObsessive lovers are the perfect example of this bit of wisdom. Have you ever ended a relationship—or the other person ended it – and all you can think about, talk about, complain about, cry about, is that person? You pick at the details like a kid picking at a scab. Your friends try to change the subject, not realizing that you have only one subject to your name. They finally tell you to “let go, move on.” For God’s sake, enough already. And while you are in the obsessive stage, your entire life is on hold. Worse, you’re wearing blinders like those horses they lead from fires. George Clooney could be flirting outrageously with you and you would never even see he’s there. Halle Berry might be asking for your help with a flat tire and you will give it but later you’ll remark how she was wearing your ex-gal’s perfume! Let’s move back a few years. Andrea was in a committed relationship with a man she adored. Loved. Worshiped. Lived with happily. Then Mike got himself a stalker. A very young pretty stalker. She wanted this guy and had no qualms about saying so, acting so, even right on the couple’s doorstep. The young man was not exactly chasing her away. One evening, Andrea returned unexpectedly from a visit back home in Georgia. Mike and his eager stalker were cuddled in — Andrea and Mike’s bed! Andrea left but obsessed about Mike and their life together. He begged her to return and she refused. Still, she put her life on hold for weeks, months, and then years. She couldn’t imagine anyone else as charming, as funny, as sexy. So although she and Mike never became a couple again, they weren’t a forever after couple with anyone else either. They were stuck in yesterday. This is an extreme example. But suppose Andrea had just packed it in, crossed Mike off as a dead end, and moved on? Would she then have “seen” the other men who without question were interested in her along the way? Would she now have four children and a happy home?We can stay stuck in yesterday staring at that closed door or we can cross off the impossible situations as just that – impossible — and move on. Which do you do? Meditation for the Day “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Maria Robinson Action for the Day From now on, whenever happiness leaves my life, instead of staring hopelessly and obsessively at the closed door, I’ll search carefully and patiently for the one that’s opening. The happiness I find may be different – but it may be far richer.
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